The Only exception

The story with Jessy is complicated...
Whenever I'm with him, I still get those butterflies like when I was always with him. But it's different. I'm over the sad part that we broke up.

I'm listening to this song in the dark, trying to dream of Jessy as I fall asleep. And I was picturing him and getting a montaige of all his quirky smiles and his big green eyes. All the quirks I love, trying to spark emotion. A tear or two, but nothing. Not because I didn't care, it's because it wasn't time yet. I'm half way fallen in love. Right between heaven and earth. Come with me, take my hand. We'll go to the skies. Float on clouds. I'll take you away. haha. Anthem Trance. :D

This shall be good, I never told you.
Nah, This is Christian's song.....
Even though, Christian is really good in bed and sexy as hell!! I know I'm not the one for him.
Aw, Swing life away... His favorite song.
Then again, He's really smart and has his redneck tendencies, that makes me feel like home :)
Oh my gosh, It's almost 5am... hahaha
One more song memory.
Polygraph, Right now.
All my Life.

Anyways. as i was saying... Jessy and I both agree that we still love each other, but more like a caring love not a in love. That we both would have to work to fall back in love. He's not sure if it's worth the effort of work. I don't see what he's afraid of though. I'm ready whenever he is ready. I wouldn't have planned the wedding if i wasn't serious.

Being the one the forks in his road, makes me feel slightly empty. I don't know what to do. I just can't wait til he decides which fork he wants to take. Yet, I don't want to make myself unavailable if he needs me. For a ride, a cig, anything. I'm here for him. I bought a pack right before I saw him when he asked for a cigarette and always try to give him a couple as I leave.

Complicated.