Some random

Promiscuous

Casual, Unrestrained

Delirious, Colorful, Wild

Slut

Lust

Passion, Greed

Desire, Crave, Obsence

Physical

Love

Affection, Cherish

Warmth, Romance, Loyal

Forever

Conservative

Decorum, Control

Prude, Dull, Perfect

Virgin

Unfinished

She glances at the clock across the room. It's blinks lime green "3:34". She rolls back over and closes her eyes. Restless. Tears begin to form. She bits back the overwhelming feeling and takes a deep breath.Just count the sheep. You can get through this. Her mind tells her. Too late. Tears are streaming. She buries her head deep into her pillow. How could I be so stupid? She sobs harder. It's harder to breathe. She sits up. Look at me. I'm so pathetic! She gets up, deciding that she will never get back to sleep. At least not tonight. She reaches down for her cell phone that she threw across the room earlier. Really? Your going to check your inbox? You know it's empty! He doesn't care about you! He didn't say 'goodnight', or 'I've made a huge mistake'. No, this is real. Just go back to bed. She stands in the middle of her room. She stares at her insomniac bed. It's all your fault! You made me this way. So obsessive, so insecure, so unlovable. I hate you! She puts on her jacket, grabs her keys, and walks out the door. Where are we going? Her mind races. Just get in and drive. Turn right here. Turn left here. I can't believe your heading towards his house. A sigh escapes. She parks at the park about four blocks away from his house. Well, we can either bang his door down and piss him off and just make things more complicated or just drive back home. No no no. I did not come out all this way just to turn around. Your so right. I can't just knock on his door at four in the morning excepting some kind of love. Gah, I wish life was just a fairytale. Oh yes, cause life is just that simple. No wonder he couldn't love you. You talk to yourself. Shut up! It's normal. Can't I talk to myself? No, no you can't. Why not? People think it's weird. You don't wanna be that one weirdo that's talks to yourself, do ya? No... I don't think I do. What the hell are you talking about? Gah, can't you just stay focused for like five minutes! What am I going to do? She starts pacing.

Great...

So there's two people in front of you. Both great fantastic people. Mister A: Great looks, Mister B: Great personality.

The great question of looks vs. personality. Tough.
Let's rundown all the pros and cons shall we:

Mister A

Pros:

• There for me
• Would make gorgeous babies
• outgoing
• comforting
• seems like I could spend the rest of my life with

Cons:

• thinks he's ugly
• says no one likes him
• self pity
• doesn't get excited when i'm excited
• depressed

Mister B

Pros:

• Sweetheart
• awesome personality
• great style
• gets excited when i'm excited
• quiet shy weird like me

Cons:

• farts around me
• balding
• bad teeth
• can't tell how serious he is
• lacking boyfriend label

They share the same money problems. One is 19. One is 17. Both have jobs, both don't drive at the moment. I just can't figure this out. I would really need that push from mister b if he's serious into me or...

Because of You

Everything has changed

we are apart not together

I'm kissing that guy not him

He's with her not me

These tears are for him

He can't hear these apologies

He's too busy with life

He's says it's all my fault

What am I suppose to do

I only follow the crowd

follow the wanted

wanted not wanting me

This finger is reserved

He knows that

He doesn't believe

Can I change before the end

What am I suppose to say

I only seem to make things worse

make things complicated

complicated like me

I'm realizing the truth

between us

he made me see that

opened my eyes

I still cry

wanting the past

needing the past

predicting the future

"If we make it through hell

then we will know

we were honestly

Meant for Eachother"

How I Feel Sexy

I've been wondering: I think I'm the most flirtiest girl out of my friends. I've gotten every guy I've ever wanted and they haven't. Or maybe all the guys I've ever wanted were so low that anyone with two legs could get them. Besides that point, I wanted them, I got them. I have these sexy spells, where I wake up and look sexy. Or there's the ugly spells where I wake up and feel like crap and don't even wanna put on makeup or do my hair. Anyways...after this boy there's only one more boy left.

This boy is god. Untouchable, but somehow has been wanting me lately. I don't get it. I start a converstion with him, nothing. My friend uses my phone to text him, bam! He wants me the next minute. I thought I knew everything there was to the opposite sex. Apparently not. I'm at complete shock.

another post.