Don't you hate when your listening to sad love songs and tons of memories flash in your head and butterflies rush and your throat tightens and you start missing someone. I do it alot. I almost start crying because I miss those moments with them. I'm currently listening to This year's love by David Gray. haha It makes me want to be that girl in The girl next door. the best part of that movie. Who doesn't want to be swept off their feet? i don't want to name names, but I've been thinking a lot lately about this boy I've had a crush for seven years...or more. He lives 200 miles away and confuses me. he likes me, he hates me. ugh.. We met in thing called Demolay. I don't want to get started on what that is. while it was thriving I would get to seem at least 4x a year. I think everyone knew I liked him haha. it was pretty obvious. and there was a few incidents where we were finally alone and got to hold handsss. hahaha. Even this one time I broke the rules and slept in the boys room with him. oh boy were the adults mad. haha. no we didn't do anything. but how I wisheddd. Lol. I was still a virgin so you could imagine what I was thinking.
Out of the blue, months after this fight we had, he txted me! Now I was all good in my life. you know steady relationship, school was somewhat good. it was all up and up. but no....he had to txt me right then and all those feelings came back to me. I got all smiles and hearts in my eyes..ugh. How can someone make me turn into goo from just saying "Hi"?!? Now I can't stop thinking about him....I know I'm lame.
What love makes you do.
makes you blind
makes you weak
makes you insane
even kills you
it's a powerful thing.
And I hate it, It feels so good, but always hurts the worst in the end.
If he only knew how much I care about him, and how much he means to me. That I know that every girl he goes out with, is wrong for him, but in the end I hope he is happy.
and every relationship i have, something is still missing.
He'll always have a place in my heart.
--Jennifer
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